I am Alive!

One of my new challenges in life is that I am facing nowadays. I have lived long years of panic and fear from such commitment. I struggled for long time but I failed...failed in each trial. I was about to lose faith in my own self.
Risk has been the core of my life, however, I could not take the risk whenever it comes to commitment to someone. I have always failed! I always step back when it's time to step forward.

Now, I am totally drawn to him. Such a feeling, that I never felt before, that is totally new and strange to me. I am totally impressed. Never imagined that someone could impress me one day. Can't believe it's real.
I'm wondering whether it's a dream...one of my day dreams that I am living through. How could he melt all the accumulated fear over years? How could he just simply ease my worries? In a single moment, all the emotions deep inside were turned 180 degrees after too many failure trials.

Where have you been? I have been searching for you for 33 years...throughout the entire of my life. I have always believed you are there...somewhere. I have always had the faith that GOD will send you to help me out one day...that you will bring back life to my soul. I have been waiting for you.

Faith is back. Life is different while you are here. Now, it seems that I never lived before...that I never tasted the true taste of life...of living. How life can be so different!
I don't want to remember the days I lived before seeing you...they seem like a nightmare compared to the days I am spending with you. Is this how love tastes like?! Stupid me when I thought I loved before.

Long journey...long time I have waited...but finally you are here. My sense never lied. I still have faith. I knew you would come. I was right.

I am alive :)

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